"I think in a way, you're doomed, once you can envision something. You're sort of doomed to make it happen. I've found that the moment I can envision leaving a relationship, that's usually the moment that the relationship starts to fall apart."

"Reality means you live until you die. The real truth is nobody wants reality."

"Sometimes you do something, and you get screwed. Sometimes it's the things you don't do, and you get screwed."

"I've always thought stand-up comedians were the oral storytellers of our time, because they know rhetoric, they know delivery, they know timing, they know all of these things that you can only learn by telling a story out loud and interacting with an audience."

"On Sunday morning, I'm not nervous... I can't wait to tell what God wants me to say."

"We want to answer this classical question, who am I? So I think that most of our works are for art, or whatever we do, including science or religion, tried to answer that question."

"A humble soul understands that the essence of humanity is our ability to connect."

"It's God's will for you to live in prosperity instead of poverty. It's God's will for you to pay your bills and not be in debt."