"I'm an old-fashioned guy... I want to be an old man with a beer belly sitting on a porch, looking at a lake or something."

"With any part you play, there is a certain amount of yourself in it. There has to be, otherwise it's just not acting. It's lying."

"I am doing things that are true to me. The only thing I have a problem with is being labeled."

"There's a drive in me that won't allow me to do certain things that are easy."

"When I was a kid, among the other embarrassing things I would do, and there's a list of stupid things, but I would make these dumb comedy tapes. I would often make prank phone calls, but I would also do it with friends."

"I like reading Ball Tongue lyrics and all that stuff. And they published a book, and I wouldn't give my lyrics, and it's all wrong in the book, and I giggle. It's funny."

"To truly laugh, you must be able to take your pain, and play with it!"

"Stand up is really fun because if I think of a joke or a funny idea, then I can just go and tell some people and if they laugh, they laugh right away."